Saturday, November 22, 2008

Beauty(read:Retarded) Cults.

If you are the majority of bored, haunted, teenage youth, you know about a site called VampireFreaks.com.
I enjoy this site, particularly because it's alot more fun than myspace at times.
AND, I get to laugh at the "scene kids" who decide that it's ok to flaunt their underage bodies all over the web, and brag about their 19 year old emo boyfriends from Turkey..

Fuck dude.

But anyway, there are certain "clubs" that you can join on the site. In keeping with the dark theme of the website, these clubs are called "Cults". There is a cult for basically anything. From kids who've lost a loved one, to completely random ones about duck tape. But the biggest rib-tickler of all, are the so-called Beauty Cults.

Ah, yes. Beauty Cults. The self-proclaimed "Elite" of VF. What I think is funny, is that there are HUNDREDS of these cults, and every one of them bear "elite cult, we have beauty AND brains, most active cult on VF." Really? How can you ALL be elite? And, upon joining, (if you don't have to fill out an application in complicated HTML and bright colors about how much you actually care about the world, that is.) you will see a bunch of stuck-up girls who all have the SAME hair style, the SAME makeup, the SAME clothes. It's like High School all over again. And they say, "Oh, we want the best. We want beauty AND brains." But then, all they do is bitch about the SAME damn things.

You know what I want? I want to discuss rocketFUCKINGscience and not have to worry about some douchebag fourteen year old girl telling me that Hannah Montana is cool. FUCK YOU, YOU TOOL. IF I WANTED YOUR OPINION, I'D FUCKING SLAP YOU TIL YOU BLED ONE. OKAY?!?!?!?!?

That's the problem with the youth nowadays. They're fucking stupid. Disney skanks are turning them into retarded, meth-addicted, whores.

Fuck me.

-Brittany

P.S. If I ever see Miley Cyrus in person, I will fucking hit her in the vagina and spit in her face.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Guys, Heed This Advice

Recently, a number of things have compiled to set in motion this blog.
Personally, I don't think that most guys realize that some of the things they say, no matter how subtle the remark, hurt their girls. Even your FRIENDS that are girls feel this way at times.
Face it guys, we are sensitive creatures. And we really don't want to hear how your best friend's wife makes the "BEST nachos ever".
Sounds silly, right?
We know.. But sometimes, we can't help the reactions we have.. I mean, sure, we can hide it for awhile, but eventually it just builds up, and one day we might just break and angrily scream about it.
Because I know that you guys have NO IDEA that what you said made us mad, I'll post a little help for you.

1. DO NOT compare her to your sister. Adopted or not.-(Don't laugh, I know people who do this.) We don't want to hear about how she's so much better at handling everything about you than we are.

2. Don't make plans before you go to work and then come home and decide that you don't want to, you're too tired, etc.-By this time, we're already excited, so we've come home early,(or never left) and we're already dolled up. So when you come home, we're expecting to do what we planned. Hearing your excuses just drives us insane. And if you're a guy who does this alot, good luck, honey. See what WE withold.

3. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES, do you talk over her when she has something to say.-This causes severe aggravation, annoyance, etc. Frankly, it just pisses us off. We listen to what you say, now it's your turn. And if what we're saying is important, this just makes us never want to talk about anything like that ever again. We'll take it upon ourselves to decide. You wanted a plasma screen TV in the game room? Highly doubt you're getting it.

4. If you get into a fight, and she runs off, give her some time, then go after her, or call her to see if she's okay.- Guys, we WANT you to come after us after awhile. Or else it just looks like you don't care enough about our well-being to check on us. We're probably fine, but it doesn't hurt to make sure. I shows us how much you care.

5. When you feel the urge to look up old high school friends, don't try to hide it from her.-This just makes us more suspicious. And it's ridiculous. And for the love of God, don't recall to us every detail of that one weekend... We don't want to hear it!

6. If stories of her ex's make you mad, angry, or uncomfortable, DON'T tell her stories of YOURS and expect her to be okay with it.- Take your feelings when she told you her story and magnify it by times 5. That's how we feel. And we tend to get more jealous, because while we might not know THIS person, we know someone LIKE her. And that makes it all the more painful to think about.

7. Do not loudly proclaim that you are deleting a text message, picture, file, etc.- Ever heard of the old adage, "Curiousity killed the cat"? Well stuff like this not only makes us curious, it pisses us off, and gets us to thinking, "What was that? Why did he delete it? Why did he loudly SHOUT that he was deleting it?" This is probable reason not to trust you. And to go through any and all of your suspected things. Sure, you deleted it. But that makes us think, either you have something to hide by deleting it, or makes us wonder what you did to come in possession of said media.

8. If your "other" dislikes your mother, father, sister, etc., and says something about them, do not go and TELL this person.- Handle it yourself, tattletale. You're a big boy. In a nice way, be like, "Baby, you know that they can't help it." Or something non-confrontal like that. I'm sure that there's a reason, and if you jump back to #3, you can find out what it is.

9. If you have stories about your friend who is a girl, or your sister, and they involve your friends, co-workers, and others close to asking for her number or saying that it's your loss because you're not dating HER, please for GOD'S sake, DO NOT tell your "other" in a way that makes it seem like you regret not doing what they're talking about.- Convey it in a way that gives the information of the story, but doesn't make it seem like you're pining for another. Makes US feel worthless..

10. Don't ignore her "I Love You's" because you're watching TV, reading, trying to sleep, etc.- You have a mouth. It takes 2 seconds to say it back. She'll love you forever for making the effort to say it, no matter what you're doing.


That's all for now. Check back later, and I'm SURE that there will be more up.
Have fun!!

-Brittany

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Don't. Drink. The Water.

It's 9:15am here..
Ridiculous hour for me to be awake, but I can't sleep.
I'm excited for tomorrow. (Going to Georgia, I'll post about that later.)
Plus it's fucking freezing.

My fingers aren't getting any warmer, so I figured that I'd write about something that absolutely BLOWS my mind..
And I'm constantly being reminded of it..
There are so many more girls getting pregnant at younger and younger ages.. Is it the cool thing to do?? A new trend maybe?? I say it's fucking ridiculous.

So, I lived in a small city called St. Marys in the state of Pennsylvania, for most of my life..
Throughout my life in High School, I saw countless girls go through the trauma of being pregnant and in school.
I had close friends who went through senior year helpless.. Missing classes, struggling to keep up, things that no one should go through so young.
But hey, that's their choice. And I know that they probably didn't mean for it to happen in the first place.
But that's not what this is about.

THIS entry, is about how, everywhere I look, I see younger and younger girls toting babies around. Wal*Mart, schools, walking around town, they're EVERYWHERE!!
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What really makes me go WTF is how I hear them say that "I thought that if I got pregnant, he would stay with me.."
!!!!!!!!
That's no lie. I hear it all the time. I feel really bad for them, if they're so blind to the future that they feel the need to get pregnant just to keep a relationship..
Girls, I have news for ya..
It doesn't always work.

I have a few friends who have been in relationships for a long time, and they accidentally got pregnant.. It didn't make it any easier on the relationships, but they pulled through. Want to know their secret?? They knew that they were going to support each other through the ordeal.
Do you know that? No, no. Don't say, "I think." If you have any doubts at all, don't even THINK about it.
And if you're under AT LEAST 18, smack yourself in the face until the urge passes, because girlfriend.. Unless your mama is VERY supportive, or you plan on winning the lottery, there isn't ANY way that you will be able to afford that baby.
And that's just for the baby. Supporting you is a whole different story.
And what about the daddy? Where is he?
8 times out of 10, he's gonna freak and leave you to deal with your baby. Alone.
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THIS^^^^ is horrible. I wonder where he is now that the baby was born..

Advice for you, wait until you're older. That way you can look back and go, "What the hell was I thinking?" without any consequences.

Is it in the water, or am I missing some mutated fertility gene?? I have no idea.
I broke the family curse. All the first born children have been girls, and they have gotten pregnant at 17.
I'm 18 and still goin' strong.
I hope to make something of myself so I can have a good home for the baby when I decide I want one.

So, don't drink the water, kick his good-for-nothing ass to the corner, and keep it an Absolut® world.
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-Brittany

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Dance Like A Corporate Robot

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Mmmhmm. I went there.

It's presently 12:02am here. I've just got done reading Josh's latest blog(link is in my friends cloumn, far right). This has sparked a blog-worthy anger. Not at him, but at the subject of which he writes.
For those of you who are lazy and don't want to click on the link, here's a summary:

Josh writes about Tom Gabel, the vocalist for the band Against Me!. In his opinion, the earlier works of AM! are better than the current ones. Unintelligible lyrics about heartfelt matters, like hating starbucks (a'la Reinventing Axl Rose) vs. pop-ish swaying and drummed over vocals (a'la Random Hearts and Conceptual Paths) are something that he feels very strongly about. The blog is titled "What the fuck, Tom Gabel".
Josh goes on to discuss how maddened he is that Against Me! is becoming more like Green Day, with its music changing to please today's mainstream society.
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As you can see, the new and 'reinvented' Green Day is dressed in the traditional mainstream black couture, complete with eyeliner and too-tight pants. Awesome. Another job well done for the corporation. Done in by the label thinking "Good PR".

Bullshit. I know of many bands who have overcome obstacles without giving in to the oh-so-tempting 'sell-out' mantra.

Taking Back Sunday
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Taking Back Sunday had it hard. Losing members is always hard on a band, but TBS lost so many members, that it's a wonder they're still around. The current members of TBS are Adam Lazzara, Matthew Fazzi, Eddie Reyes, Matt Rubano, and Mark O'Connell. Compare THAT to the original lineup including Fred Mascherino, Jesse Lacey, John Nolan, Shaun Cooper, Antonio Longo, and Steven DeJoseph.

Mind boggling, right? The members fought so much, that Fred Mascherino finally left after he declared that TBS "concentrated harder on learning to cook, than making music". He went on to pursue his solo career, 'The Color Fred'. Which basically sucks, in my opinion. If you read this, Fred, sorry dude. You shoulda stayed with TBS. I would've taught you guys how to cook..

Anyway, it really saddens me that most bands don't have a chance of holding their ground when the label decides that it's time for a change.. It's either change and take aim at the mainstreamers, or pack their shit as a band and try to find a new label.

Sigh. It's always inspiring when you hear about bands overcoming certain obstacles. You can read about something in Alternative Press that really brightens your outlook on life. (Jack's Mannequin, anyone?) Makes you want to believe that you are your own person.

But then again, are you really?? The answer is fairly obscure.. The corporations have got their hands in every cookie jar. Even yours, probably. Can you honestly say that you have a mind of your own? THAT, my friends, is a big NO these days. With more and more censorship creeping up on us, it's only a matter of time before every house, child, and GASP!, microphone are bugged and beamed straight to the secret government hideout in the second 'L' on the HOLLYWOOD hill.

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Stay paranoid, my friends.
-Brittany

Monday, October 27, 2008

The Relationship Saga, Part 1

If you can tell by the title of this entry, it is going to be about... YOU GUESSED IT!
Relationships.
"Oh, man..", you're thinking, "Another girl trying to tell everyone else what needs to be done in a relationship through HER point of view.." Right?
Wrong!
This is going to be a place where I can get everything off my chest, while enlightening you in the process from a non-biased point of view...To the best of my ability. Now then..
On with the show!

Relationships are so infuriating at times.. You fall all starry-eyed in love with someone, and then one day you wake up and think, "This is what I've waited my whole life for??", or worse..
They piss you off one day, and you say to yourself, "What was I thinking??"
Well... I'm here to tell you that you will never be able to keep these thoughts out of your head for good... You will always have good days and bad..
You can be deliriously happy with the significant other one day, and then the next, they may just do something so stupid that, if they weren't so close to you, you'd just hit them upside the face and say, "What the hell?!?"

Don't worry. It happens to the best of us. Even those gooey, PDA-loving, sappy, gag-me, groping-in-the-hallways couples have doubts some days. And maybe those doubts aren't always about the other person.. Maybe you ask yourself some days, "What if I'm not good enough? What if I find myself attracted to someone else? What do I do then??"
Ugh.. And those are the tough questions..

TRUST
This is a BIG one in relationships.. No matter how many times you tell yourself that you trust them, one day you'll be in one of those moods, and you'll wonder, "Just where the hell have they BEEN?" Shove it aside, folks.. Because the green-eyed monster of jealousy will get you, and they don't loose their hold on you for a longgggg time. And for the people who have been cheated on, used, and tossed, this is an even bigger struggle for them. Because the monster already HAS them, and if they've been realllllly careful, it's just hiding under the stairs, waiting to strike at that first sign of doubt.
So unless you actually FIND something worth distrusting, just believe them. Trust me, it'll be soooo much easier.
(Just don't go hacking into their myspace account.. That'll just sic the monster faster. And 9 times out of 10, they don't delete their inbox, and you'll get your jealousy from the 3 year old messages that you find. Dont.do.it.)

RESPONSIBILITY
Another biggie. Not QUITE as big as trust, but right up there.
The significant other wants to know that they can count on you to hold up your part of the bargain.. Say they expect you to cancel that one appointment, or they expect the house to be clean when they get home.. Or whatever.. You don't do it?? Sure, it might be fine the one or two times that you forget, but after awhile, they stop relying on you to do things, and just get reallllly pissed off when you forget the next time. After that, the trust starts to fall right with the responsibility..and then they start treating you like your mom did when you didn't eat your peas.. No dessert? That is code for sooo many other things now that you're an adult.. Same concept though.. My advice to you is.. Make a chart, write stuff down.. Whatever will help you to remember. Don't like cleaning?? Pick up garbage and organize things.. Then run the vaccuum. You've done more than they expect.. And then the next day, you can do laundry or whatever else. Just slowly build up. Then you can expect the "dessert" when they realize that you made an effort.

THE CHILDHOOD FACTOR
You may not know what this is. This is something that I came up with after an exepected talk with my "other". Here is what it is:
Can you laugh with your "other"? Can you giggle at restaurants, or skip through the store holding hands, and just generally be a goofball every now and then? This is the "childhood factor".
Everyone loves to laugh. Even the stuffy Wall Street lawyer types like to loosen their ties and live it up a little. You just have to find that 'niche'. Go scouting a little. Find that ONE little thing that your other liked to do when they were little. Climb trees? Go for it. Explore caves? By all means, spelunk, my friend. He was a Boy Scout? Make a fort out of blankets in the living room. She liked to dance? Be her Fred Astaire. Make their favorite "child" food. PB&J with the crusts cut off? OO-kay!
Whatever you think will make them feel like a kid without a care in the world.
Rake leaves and jump in the pile. Walk in the woods. Push each other on the swings. WHATEVER. They will absolutely love you for making them laugh. And whatever you do, don't forget to have fun with them, laugh with them. You'll love the reaction you get.


This is the end of this blog. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Enjoy the time you have together.
-Brittany

Saturday, August 2, 2008

And this is why I shouldn't care..

Evening..

Well, I wanted to write about something that's been bothering me for a couple years now...
It's become even more evident recently..

I have discovered that no matter how nice I am to a person, they still want nothing to do with me.. I believe the term "used" is in order here.
I mean, I would give someone the proverbial "shirt off my back" and it still would not matter. If I am in possession of an object that someone is in need of, I would hand it over, and I would not think twice about it..
Example: Pretend that I had a crayon. A person (could be a stranger for all intents and purposes, doesnt matter) casually lets slide that he/she is in need of a crayon/writing utensil. I would hand said person, said crayon without a word. But after using what I so graciously provided, said person would have no further use for me..
Understood?

Yes. It is becoming more and more clear now that I am older. And yet, it still hurts.
Hence, I should just not care.
Right?

-Brittany

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Fuckin' Shit.

So. I've been having one of those shitty, bored, depressed, then happy, then bored and depressed, etc. days.

I was home bored until about 15 minutes ago. Then the other half came home. The happy mood kicked in.
Then, he has to go into asshole mode and won't kiss me hello because I happened to be wearing lip gloss.
Pissed mood.

Wiped off said gloss. Still will not kiss me because he claims to "taste" said wiped off gloss.
Still pissed.
So. Now he's watching The Mist when he knows perfectly well that I don't like horror movies.


Oh, spite.
-Helena, Shakespeare's Midsummer Night's Dream